Full Circle

05 Apr

Some of you might be reading this and scratching your head wondering what in the world is she doing?  Well, I’m making this move deliberately and consciously with the full support of my husband and children.  Honestly, we are all excited about the adventure that lies ahead and for the kids each day will be like an extended summer vacation.  We have not stamped an expiration date on this journey, so we might still be on this path by winter or we may have found a new zip code.  In my mind whatever happens is part of the bigger plan called Life and I’m grateful for the opportunity to discover what makes me tick.  I’m very proud to have mustered the courage to be Me and all that entails (thank you Kelly B).

When I awoke this morning I kept thinking “full circle” and wondered why this concept was so important.  Tonight I was studying with my oldest son and suddenly realized the significance of this thought.  I truly had an epiphany!  (Don’t you just love that word?  It’s so much fun.)  You know…a light bulb moment.  I finally understood why I had been pushing away the very idea of a simpler life, because in the past simple equalled failure in my brain.  For years I thought the chaos of work and hectic schedules and accumulating stuff meant I was a success.  I actually believed this insanity!  I also tried really hard to conform to society’s definition of success and normal.  I was never at peace or happy with myself in this state and now I know why.  Crazy Land is not where I want to reside.  Please understand that I absolutely love my work, but will be conducting business a little differently.  Helping others and inspiring people to help themselves is in my DNA (thank you Troy) and I wouldn’t abandon that part of my life for anything.  That is my purpose on Earth.  I have learned what’s most important to me and that is being present NOW for myself, my family, and everyone that I encounter.  Life is what me make of every moment.  Now I measure success by the amount of joy that I’m experiencing.  I certainly cannot put a price tag on that.

Most people who know me are not aware that I grew up very modestly.  Literal translation:  dirt poor.  I programmed my brain to accept a distorted reality of believing the further and faster I ran from anything that resembled my childhood the better.  I figured if I lived a life that looked completely different from the way I grew up I was successful.  This was actually my measuring stick.  That’s because I believed that being poor meant failure or at a minimum lack of success.  My personal concept of success now has nothing to do with my net worth.  It has everything to do with my self-worth though.  I’ve come completely full circle and back to where I began as a child.  A simple life!  However you want to dissect it I have realized that being Me is about living my life on purpose with passion.  I almost feel like saying, “Hello You, where have you been?  Or what took you so long?  Or, duh!”


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